12.29.2005

Bitchiness

I just saw an ad for some site that had a picture of Paris Hilton and was titled “Confessions of a Modern Day Cinderella”. I am sorry. But Paris Hilton is no Cinderella. Cinderella had a wicked step-mother and two evil step-sisters. Cinderella was forced to do all of the chores (chores = actual work). Cinderella wore rags. And, in fact, the only reason Cinderella got to be a princess was because she got a fairy godmother who magically turned her into one.

Paris has parents worth millions of dollars and have absolutely given her too much of it. Paris has never done a chore. Paris wears things that resemble rags (a lot of the time) but they are made by Gucci or Louis and cost more money that Cinderella saw in her whole lifetime. In my opinion, the word ‘princess’ denotes prestige and class…the name Paris does not.

The moral of the story, kids? Is that Paris Hilton…lots of money…still a skank. Cinderella…no money…still a princess. Will someone explain this to Her Skankiness, please? Thank you.

In other news, I see that Suzie Sunshine, (a girl in my office) got some FMBs (Fuck Me Boots) for Christmas. She looks like one of the girls in that Robert Palmer video. It makes me giggle.

I know, I know, I sound a little bitter today. But it is for good reason. That alien is back. You know the one that resides right between your hip bones, that tries to escape from your body once a month. (You know the one…from the movie?) Yeah. He has returned and has currently got his slimy little fingers around my ovaries and is squeezing the very life out of them. Sounds lovely, doesn’t it? (This is where my rant on “If men had periods…” would normally begin, but today, for that rant, I will refer you to the Notorious CHO. Margaret, that is. Take it away…)

Ricky should be in town now. He called about three hours ago, stuck in traffic in Daytona. So…shouldn’t be long now. Although, I can’t, for the life of me, figure out why he would come on a day that I will be stuck at work until 5 and even then, I get home, and have to get up tomorrow and come back here again. Ricky…you’re weird…and you are causing me to want to go home (more than I normally do…) Darn you to H-E Double Hockey sticks.

2 comments:

wmjwatson said...

Plus, I don't remember Cinderella being such a slut.
OK, so she was a tease...but not a SLUT!

spaceface said...

WORD.