Phrases from Thursday:
ME: Then you’d be…like…a hooker…
HIM: No, then I’d be a physical therapist.
ME: And then Spliff would be fascinated with you and make you wear heels.
ME: But don’t worry, no one would know you were a hooker unless you were wearing heels. So, if you don’t wear them…
HIM: What the fuck are you talking about?!
HIM: I can’t not wear heels!
HIM: You’re nuts!
ME: Right. Of course.
ME: That was silly of me.
Because in Win, Lose or Draw, the only thing separating a regular girls from the hookers is the shoes. Duh.
Brandy: I wrote a song about you.
Crizzle Ann, Crizzle Ann, she’s hotter than bacon in a frying pan. Deep inside, she’s a lonely gay man, but on the outside, she’s got a nice rack!
Me: That was really beautiful.
On Brandy’s song:
Me: I love that girl.
JGJ: I know, it shows in your rack.
On JGJ on Brandy’s song:
Me: I thought you would like to know that I wear my love for you like a bra.
Brandy: That’s wonderful…
Me: You know who I miss? Scott Baio.
Brandy: That reminds me of when Brandon used to act like a "gay T-Rex"...he would pose like a T Rex and say "roaaar" in a really effeminate way..it was funny.
Me: I actually remember that!
There were others…involving sex with butchers, songs about cake, paper bag mushrooms, sandwiches and and a boy who used to pull my hair who now works at the hospital with me. Yes. It was a very productive day.
Stuck-in-my-head Song of the Day: "Wilt" - Blind Melon