Okay, first let me just say that I HATE the VMAs...
This being said, you should know that Spliff loves awards shows and that I end up watching them any time they are on and they usually make me want to swallow my own head...BUT, I do it because I love her. And because she is a remote nazi. Either way, I watch them...and I hate them. And I can honestly say that I hate EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON. that was on the VMAs tonight...ASIDE from Amy Winehouse and Dre.
First and foremost, I am not big on new music. It sucks. Almost all of it. Anything that is played on MTV and is VMA worthy anyway...But the fact that Amy Winehouse didn't win anything bothers me. She looks scary and evidently needs to go to rehab (but said "no, no, no") but her songs are fucking good. And she doesn't sound like Ashley Simpson. (Thank you, Amy, for not being a complete fucktard...) I don't love her. But I don't hate her and she was the only one nominated that I can say that about. So why the fuck didn't she win anything? She is unique and she wears bad eyeliner in a better way than Jared Leto. I hope she wins something better...like...Coolest fucked-up broad in the bidness.
Also...HOLY GOD. What happened to Dre?
I have always had an unhealthy crush on Dre. Always. But now, he is cut...CUT...and it brings my unhealthy crush to a whole new level. I didn't hear a word you said, Dre, because I was staring at your beautiful shoulders. Marry me. I know that I am white and whatever...but I have a big ass. And I swear...I am totally worth it.
And Common, although you are hot as hell, you are a bastard and a racist and I hate you. You shouldn't be allowed to play with Kanye. Fuck you.
That is all.