What’s funny about working in health care is that, you see things so much differently than the actual patients do. When you are a patient, you see the sugary sweet side of the profession. You see this caring, nurturing side of the people in the office, the nurses, the doctors. And then, behind the scenes, you see the irritation when a patient calls for adjustment on their medication. Or from a concerned family member who just wants someone to tell them that everything will be fine. It’s disheartening. I see it a lot where I am. I understand where it comes from, because we work in a stressful place and sometimes forget why we are there in the first place. But sometimes…I just wanna smack some people around.

LBG is coming over right now to steal the letter. The more I think about it, she might have to pry it from my cold, dead hands. I hadn’t really even considered it in a few days. I had been perfectly content not doing anything about it. For now at least. And now that the reality that it is actually going to be mailed is setting in, I feel like a spaz again. In fact, I am going to have to buy more cigarettes. Immediately. Now I kind of wish I had never written it. Things won’t be the same ever again. Because no matter what I do now, it will always be there. This outpouring of emotional dribble that was never intended for anyone else’s eyes. That was written solely to put my mind at ease. Maybe someday, I will thank LBG, right now though, I feel like beating her with…well something. And not really anything big or scary, because I love her and she would just hurt me back. Or throw my shoes on the roof. And lemme tell ya…you don’t want your shoes on the roof.

Ricky had a dream that we were in England and I was dressed like Daisy Duke. Hmm…