Thirty Day Song Challenge

My friend L7 has been posting song titles and videos and stuff on Twitter all week and I finally just Googled this “Thirty Day Song Challenge”, found it here and here and decided to try it out on my blog. I haven’t done anything like this in a long time. So, what the hell, internet? Let’s get to it, shall we? (Feel free to join in, I am going to go ahead and tag my little friend Hespy over here so I am not playing alone!)

Day One: Your Favorite Song

This one, internet, is kind of a toughy. I hate being asked this question because there is no correct answer. This all depends on my mood. And generally speaking, my mood is not too…um…predictable. So, naturally, neither will my choice for “favorite song”. 

I think that the song that has held significance for me for the longest time and that I still absolutely LOVE, is “Black” by Pearl Jam. I remember the first time that I heard it and it attaches to some very fond and beautiful memories of someone who has now passed away. I remember the first time I saw it performed live and I remember the way that it made my whole body shudder. Say what you will, internet, but Eddie Vedder is a supremely talented guy (and I refuse to fault him for growing up and not sounding like he did in 1992. Grunge is over. You learn, you grow. Get over it, haters.) and the lyrics of “Black” are beautifully melancholic. I love it.

The List:
Day One: Your Favorite Song (see above)
Day Two: Your Least Favorite Song
Day Three: A Song that Makes You Happy
Day Four: A Song that Makes You Sad
Day Five: A Song that Reminds You of Someone
Day Six: A Song that Reminds You of Somewhere
Day Seven: A Song that Reminds You of a Certain Event
Day Eight: A Song that You Know All the Words To
Day Nine: A Song that You Often Hear on the Radio

You Wanna See Me Fall Down?

Before I get into this story, I would like to explain yesterday's bitter post.

If you know me, you know that there are three musicians that I would kill to know. Eddie Vedder being the number one, end all be all, love of my life. I think he is a genius. And he is beautiful. And I have been OBSESSED with Pearl Jam since I was 12. I have more Pearl Jam CDs and magazines and records and, well, you name it. I. LOVE. PEARL JAM. Because I love them this much, I found it really hard to be happy for my friends who were going to be at the show. Mostly, I was minutes away from making a full body costume out of Clifftopher so that everyone would think I was him. Because Clifftopher? Backstage passes. Brother is friends with Matt Cameron. And I? At home. Crying.

I didn't understand how someone who couldn't possibly care as much as I about this band could be standing next to my heros. How could this happen? It should have been me! I was enraged.

So, I was upset yesterday because this was the first time since I was 14 that I haven't been able to see them when they were touring in the state of Florida (or Georgia for that matter). I was not bummed out. I was effing pissed. Naturally, when I left work yesterday, I had a few things on my mind: Cigarettes, wine and ice cream. Once I secured all of those things and made it home and tried to forget about the day. And then, I had gone outside on the porch to smoke (because I deserved it yesterday) and my phone rang and I saw that it was Clifftopher. I instantly remembered a drunken conversation of ours wherein I told him that if at any point he was close enough to Eddie to get his attention, to call me and ask him to say hello. I knew that this wasn't going to happen. But I put my phone on the loudest ringtone I have anyway.

When I answered, Clifftopher was nonchalant. He made regular conversation for a minute while I almost exploded.

"Guess who I am standing next to."

"Who?" I was barely audible because I was busy swallowing my tongue.

"Who do you think?!"

"Eddie Vedder?!" Gulp.

"Yeah!" He clears his throat and pulls the phone away from his mouth, "Hey, Eddie. Would you mind saying hi to my friend Criz?"

Then I fell down.

No, I literally fell down.

"Hi, Criz" (I can't punctuate this, because how the hell do you punctuate Eddie Fucking Vedder.)

"Hi! GOEIHFLSDNLIEHLVNDSAL" I don't really know what came out of my mouth...but then Eddie actually sort of...giggled.

"Hi, Criz"

And then I died. I don't remember anything after that. I actually don't think that there is any moment after this that will matter to me. I fell down. And then I had a seizure. And I screamed for about two hours.

I hope that you all understand the gravity of this situation, Internet. Eddie Vedder is aware of my existence. He knows that, somewhere in the world, there is a girl named Criz who falls down when she is faced with the prospect of talking to him and says words like "JGHEOLHFKLSAJ". He said MY NAME, you guys.

Clearly, this means that we are getting married. We won't have a registry, so just donate to the surfrider foundation on our behalf. Criz Vedder. Beautiful.

Bitter Blogging

This has been one of those mornings when you wake up and you just know that your bed feels too good to get out of. But you do it anyway, because you need that cash. I unrolled myself out of the "burrito" (Jer's name for how I always have the covers wrapped around me, forming this inpenatrable cocoon), started the coffee (the working girl's crack) and then took a very long, very hot shower (another place that I didn't want to leave). I was in a pretty good mood despite the grogginess and the general distaste for any day of the week that I have to wake up to an alarm. I drove to work, I listened to Ryan Adams, and I sang along...

Then...it happened. When I pulled into my parking spot and looked down at my phone, I realized I had a voicemail. I looked at my missed calls and didn't recognize the last number, so I thought I would see what kind of retard would call me at 7:45 in the morning. The first thing I heard was a ukelele and I know from experience that if you have a voicemail that is comprised only of a song, there is a reason for it. I knew right away that it was going to be a Pearl Jam song. And I knew right away who left the message even though I haven't had his number in my phone for several years. But there it was, staring right back at me and playing "Soon Forget" on my fucking voicemail, turning me into a big, bitter, blubbering mess and ruining my fucking mascara. That's right, internet, I am not going to see Pearl Jam tonight and Boy to Avoid is. As is Clifftopher. And Jules. And I, will be sitting on the couch with Spliff, crying my face off and being generally PISSED THE HELL OFF.

I am really trying to maintain a level of sanity here, but I really just don't think I can do it for long. I want to beat bitches up. (And then I want to kidnap Eddie and do bad things to him...Oh. Did I just say that?)

I am warning you know, friends, it is going to be that kind of day. And if you want to stay ALIVE, don't mention Pearl Jam to me, unless you are bringing them to my house. In which case, I will have your babies. But if that is NOT the case, and you feel the need to leave a PJ song on my voicemail, you should wear a cup. And maybe a helmet.

Top 25 Obsessions

I have been working really hard at maintaining the title of “Worst Blogger Ever” and I think I have been doing a pretty good job. So, to stay true to this title, I have decided not only to post a meme, but to post a meme that I have stolen from Sarah’s blog! YAY, ME!



I like music memes. They make me happy. Sue me.


Top 25 Most Played on my iPod!

25. Hallelujah – Jeff Buckley. Seriously. This is the most hauntingly beautiful song I have ever heard. And I know that he didn’t do it originally but it is my opinion that he did it best. R.I.P. Jeff.


24. Call Tyrone – Erykah Badu. I love, love, LOVE this song. It makes me want to get a loser boyfriend just so I can tell him about himself.

23. Ballad of Big Nothing – Elliott Smith. It’s Elliott Smith. That is all I have to say.

22. Hard Sun – Eddie Vedder. This song is from the “Into the Wild” soundtrack. It is incredible. Of course, I am biased because…well, I love Eddie Vedder.

21. Already Gone – The Eagles. This is my favorite Eagles song which is ironic because my father once told me that this is the song that reminds him of my mother. Eek. Either way, it makes me happy.

20. Volcano – Damien Rice. This song (and this album) sort of makes me want to slit my wrists but it really is beautiful. So…Ummm…

19. Letter to Elise – The Cure. Best song EVER.

18. Hang me up to Dry- The Cold War Kids. Honestly, I usually don’t like anything that I see advertized on MTV but when I heard this song, I knew it was love.

17. Amanda – Boston. I don’t know why I love this song so much. I really think it has something to do with Ricky Retardo.

16. Good Vibrations – The Beach Boys. There honestly is nothing better to listen to while lying on the beach. (Which is something I have been doing a lot of lately.)

15. As Is- Ani Difranco. She is a genius. A FUCKING GENIUS.

14. Rehab- Amy Winehouse. I have jumped on the Amy bandwagon. I really like her. She might be a lunatic junkie, but she makes me smile.

13. Sunshine Smile – Adorable. This song reminds me of Rack, Tory, Alex, some acid and trips to the mall. Because everyone knows that when you are 16 and on acid, the best place to go is to the mall.

12. Amber – 311. I like this song, but I don’t think that I listen to it this much. It reminds me of Zebrahead because for some reason, this was my ringtone.

11. Life by the Drop – Stevie Ray Vaughn. This song is like, two minutes long but it is awesome. It reminds me of Joey G’s in Madison, Indiana and that guy who played guitar with his teeth.

10. Come Pick Me Up- Ryan Adams. I think that I have explained this one before. I will listen to this song on repeat for days.

9. Shame on You – Indigo Girls. This is one of my favorite songs to sing in my car. At the top of my lungs. With the windows down so that I can dazzle (scare) pedestrians with my vocal stylings.

8. Black Hole-Greyhounds (with Ani Difranco). I didn’t know who these guys were until they opened for Mofro several years ago. They put on a great show but I really wish they would put out another album. (Hint, Hint, Guys.)

7. No Diggity- Blackstreet. This song is awesome and I listen to it constantly.

6. Ain’t No Sunshine – Bill Withers. L says this is MY song. Because I am a ray of sunshine. (She doesn’t say that, I just made that part up.)

5. Keep it Loose, Keep it Tight – Amos Lee. Listen to this song.

4. Wagon Wheel – Old Crow Medicine Show. I heard this song when I went to Raleigh to visit B and have been obsessed ever since. This entire album is amazing. Even if you don’t think that you like bluegrass. Go. Listen. Now.

3. Tiny Dancer – Elton John and Ryan Adams. This is the only thing that is better than the original Tiny Dancer.

2. When the Stars Go Blue – Ryan Adams. No, that country fucktard did not do this song originally.

1. Pearls on a String – Ryan Adams. Evidently, I listen to Ryan too much. I should branch out. I know. Anyway, I just downloaded this album pretty recently (Easy Tiger) and I love it. I love this song because it is freaking catchy as hell…and I can’t stop listening to it.

There are some songs that I listen to A LOT that didn’t make it onto this list and I am confused about that…but…this should give you a pretty good idea…So…what are YOU listening to, Internet?

Eddie and The Nose

In 1994, when I heard that Eddie Vedder had married Beth Leibling, I immediately screamed, "But her nose is the size of my head!" and then I cried for four hours and ate a carton of Phish Food. I could somehow take pleasure in the fact that, even though she was married to the love of my life, she was still ugly...and seriously, if I were 13 or 14 years older and lived in Seattle and had, you know, ever met him, that he would have married ME. Duh.

Today, seven years too late, I find out that Eddie has divorced "The Nose" and his little girl belongs to some idiot model girl. Who is only two fucking years older than me. What the hell is that?! This is a travesty, that's what!

Just so you know, I am pathetic. The mere mention of Eddie Vedder makes my legs feel like cooked spaghetti noodles and I will not have him marrying some model bimbo. I will not have it, Jill. (What kind of a name is JILL? No offense if your name is Jill...I really only hate it if it belongs to someone who is dating my husband.)

Ever since I heard Pearl Jam for the first time, I have been obsessed. I own 27 Pearl Jam CDs (most of which are not to be handled by anyone but me), several vinyls, books, magazines, posters, I have seen them 8 times in concert and I would seriously cut off both of my arms to meet Eddie. So, it pains me that, just when I had gotten used to the fact (13 years after the fact) that he had married "The Nose", I learn that they are divorced and he is dating this Jill McCormick person. I will cut her. (Even if I have no arms, I will find a way. My love is strong.)

Grrrrr...

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Now playing: Pearl Jam - Not For You
via FoxyTunes

Blah

There is a guy sitting in my yard playing the guitar and singing right now. And the only noise coming from my apartment is the clicking of keys. Now I can totally see why we are getting kicked out. Oh…wait…

I wish I could say that there has been a lot of fun stuff going on with me lately, but I can only say this, I am broke, I have cramps, and I hate my landlord. I’ve been feeling pretty…”blah”…lately. I am pissed off at my skin, my stomach, God, primetime television, people who have money, the weather, gas prices, American History, myspace, my general lack of creativity or anything interesting to say, my stupid fucking back, pretty much everything.

I’ve been spending most of my time watching bad TV and fantasizing about faking my own death and running off to a deserted island. And wondering why Sundance Head thought it was a good idea to sing “Jeremy” on American Idol last night. Seriously. I think that if you aren’t Eddie Vedder, you should not attempt to sing his songs. Stop it.

School started this week and I got started with my assignments early so that I didn’t have to worry about them over the weekend. I felt good about that, but then I got to the History assignment that I just can’t bring myself to do. I can’t read about history. I can’t do it. Pinhead used to do my history homework. (Keep in mind that I failed.)

Speaking of Jeremies and Pinheads.

I checked Jer’s myspace profile today. I found him a few months ago, realized it was set to private (I hate it when people do that!) and never checked again. Well, it isn’t private anymore. And it honestly wasn’t very interesting. Seems he is back into the import car scene (thank Cheesus I am not around for Round Two of that shit) and everything else I already knew. Wife, blah. Two kids, blah. Looks exactly the same, blah. Same old guy. Only he had Modest Mouse on his profile, which irritates me because the only way I ever knew that music destined for sell-out, was because he was listening to it. (And yes, I AM aware that Modest Mouse already did that…thankyouverymuch.) Either way, it wasn’t all that interesting.

Since the infamous Pinhead phone call, I have been having random conversations via text with him. He keeps apologizing for everything and evidently, plans to be home in about 2 weeks. It should be interesting to see him. It’s been years. I am sort of torn. I am excited to see him, because really all I ever wanted was for him to admit that he was acting like a childish asshole, and now he did that. But I think it might be hard to drag me out of this antisocial slump I’ve been in. But I guess I’ll just have to wait and see…he always was good at luring me out with him to a bar, getting me hammered and then starting a fight about something ridiculous on the way home. I can’t wait.

Death by YouTube

Swoon. Drool. Sigh.